Saturday, April 28, 2012

The Honeytrap

26 year-old England resident Samantha Phipps thought that her string of dating missteps had come to an end when she was introduced to Jack Ewing though a mutual friend. According to Phipps the two had an instant connection, “I used to count down the minutes at work to when I could see him. We had a fantastic relationship.” Within six weeks the couple had moved in together and Samantha’s streak appeared to be over.

Then one day she took his cell phone in for repairs and after it was operational again she saw a rather explicit message from another woman. Understandably upset, she confronted Jack about the illicit correspondence which he quickly dismissed as a wrong number and reassured her that his commitment to their relationship was beyond reproach. Still suspicious, she took to the Internet and stumbled across a woman known as Miss Honeytrap who specialized in testing male fidelity.
Miss Honeytrap
After Phipps coughed up a $320 fee, Miss Honeytrap arranged to bump into Jack at a pub and subtly indicate that she was interested in what he had to offer. If he took the bait, Honeytrap would arrange for a rendezvous at a local hotel where Samantha could show up and confront her man’s philandering ways. If he refused the advances, Samantha would be able to bask in the assurance that her domestic partner had eyes for only her.

As per their agreement, Samantha arranged for Jack to be out with the boys at a local watering hole and the trap was sprung. The next day Samantha called Miss Honeytrap for an update and according to her the report was grim:

“He bought her a drink and half an hour later they went outside and kissed. They even arranged to meet again on the Tuesday night. She gave me all the details of where they’d be meeting, the hotel and what time and asked if I wanted to go. I was heartbroken. He’d fallen for her so easily.”

The next day Jack left for work, never came home again, then texted Samantha that their relationship was over. Distraught, Samantha allowed some of her friends to take her to a wine bar at the end of the week to get her out of the house. Once there she ran into Jack and Miss Honeytrap out on a date. When confronted, they confirmed that they had been seeing each other since the first night at the bar. Even worse is that fact that Jack had been seeing the mystery texter, but he insisted that Miss Honeypot had made an honest man out of him. Honeytrap has even suspended her practice in the wake of their relationship. Samantha is reportedly still seeking a refund.
Jack & Samantha
 While at first glance Miss Honeytrap’s actions may seem callous and unthinkable, it is possible that she is just being thorough. After all, while a verbal agreement to a meet a strange woman at a hotel is suspicious, Miss Honeytrap could not be 100% certain that Jack was unfaithful unless she had sex with him. Any consummate professional will tell you that customer satisfaction is the top priority and Miss Honeypot took too much pride in her work to chance missing a last minute change of heart that could salvage a meaningful relationship. While other fidelity testing services offer only circumstantial evidence and conjecture, this woman was willing to go the extra mile to make certain her target was not a man of his word. If anything, Samantha owes Miss Honeypot a tip and an Angie’s List recommendation.

If it is any consolation to Samantha, I am sure Jack and Honeytrap will develop a deep emotional bond based on mutual respect and trust. Just because a man will abandon his girlfriend and current mistress for a complete stranger whose initial interest in him was funded by said girlfriend doesn’t mean he is incapable of a mature relationship. Miss Honeytrap has even given up her lucrative career of hitting on men in order to dedicate herself to making their love last.

I do wonder how Miss Honytrap got into the business to begin with. Did she wake up one day and think, “If I am going to hit on men in monogamous relationships anyway I might as well get a tax deduction out of it?” Private investigation is one thing, but hiring someone to proposition your significant other could be a self-fulfilling prophecy. What if the situation you orchestrated turned out to be the only time they would have ever strayed in the first place?  

I certainly don’t feel that Samantha gave up much of a catch. Judging by the photo, this guy is on the express train to goober-town and I am sure that she could do better. Any man who gets his girlfriend to fix the phone he uses to secretly correspond with his mistress instead of doing it himself is either really stupid or really lazy. Neither quality screams “keeper.”

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